同事离职,移交的客户第一封邮件这样发可以么?

AJ'S.Auto.Parts.&.Accessories
同事离职了,从他手上移交了一个客户过来,第一封邮件这样发可以么? Dear ···· So glad to write to you. My name is M····, I'll carry on ·····'s work. Actually, ······ will lee because of her personal reason. Two things I need to confirm with you as following: 1/ ·········· 2/ ·······. Any comments pls keep me posted! We'll try our best to cooperate with you! Sorry for any inconivenice we bring to you. Your understanding will be highly appreciated! Regards,
2013-09-12 5079阅读
问题/讨论
回复(8)
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AI回答:
你好,

我看你是想咨询一下这封移交客户的邮件是否恰当,这封邮件整体来看语言比较简洁,表达的意思基本上是可以被接受的。不过还是有几个问题需要注意:

1. 在"Dear ····"前最好加上客户的称呼,比如"Dear Mr./Mrs./Ms. ····"。
2. "So glad to write to you"可以改成"So glad to have the opportunity to contact you".
3. 我觉得"I'll carry on ·····'s work"可以改成"I'll be taking over ·····'s work".
4. 你在"actually"后面漏掉了一个单词,可能是因为打字的时候出了点小问题吧,这个需要检查一下。
5. 在"Two things I need to confirm with you as following"前最好加上问候语,比如"Hope everything is going well with you"之类的。
6. 最后一句话"Your understanding will be highly appreciated!"可以改成"Thank you for your understanding in advance!",这样显得更礼貌一些。

希望我的回答对你有帮助!
2023-06-26
追问:
  • 泰安新华锦
    简单说一下以后这些工作由你对接就可以了
    2020-10-28
  • LIJUN
    外教英语口语一对一   有需求请q我  1608488993
    2013-09-21
  • rose
    学习啦,谢谢
    2013-09-21
  • Michelle14
    不用写别人为什么离职,之需告知他的工作将由你接手即可。下体事宜的语法和句型结构转换成相对委婉的口气
    2013-09-20
  • Alin.Varga
    想拉近和客户的距离   

    距离不是用几句场面话就可以拉近的 距离需要用你的样板 你的服务去拉近的
    2013-09-20
  • molly
    其他福友有啥高见不啦?
    总感觉自己写的有点别扭,想拉近和客户的距离,但又不知道怎么写才好
    2013-09-19
  • andersonjohn
    谢谢,受教了。。。。
    2013-09-19
  • li.kai.xuan2
    掉下面的会更简单点:

    Two things

    Sorry for any inconivenice we bring to you. Your understanding will be highly appreciated!


    另外这一句  ···· will lee because of her personal reason.  你看这么写如何。。。。。。 no longer works at XXX(你家公司名字)and I will .....


    意思表达清楚就可以了 文笔见仁见智      
    fyr
    2013-09-18
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