开发信这样可以吗?

boscohuang
To:XXX
Add:XXX
Tel::XXX

Hi XXX,
Veryhononrtosendforyou!
Weunderstandyourinformationfromthecustoms.
XXX manufacturesandstocksalltypesofbucketteeth,adaptor,side-cutteraswellaswearpartsinChinasince2004.
Overonethousandmodelsformorethantencountriesaroundtheworldtopurchaser.


Everyyear,12000tonsproductivityreplacementpartsfordifferentbrandexcators,


loadersandbulldozer,


likeKOMATSU.,CAT,HYUNDAI,DAEWOO/DOOSAN,VOLVOetc...

Twocastingtechnologyguaranteesatisfactoryqualityandcompetitivepowerprice.
Wewouldlookforwardtohearingforyou!thanks!
Sincerelyyours!


XXX


这样写可以吗?
2015-03-16 701阅读
问题/讨论
回复(7)
我要向AI提问
AI回答:
您好!开发信需要注意一些问题,比如语法和排版。以下是修正后的版本:

To: XXX
Add: XXX
Tel: XXX

Dear XXX,

Greetings from China!

We learned of your information from the customs and would like to take the opportunity to introduce XXX. Since 2004, we have been manufacturing and stocking all types of bucket teeth, adapters, side cutters, and wear parts. With over a thousand models available for purchase, we currently serve customers from more than ten different countries worldwide.

Every year, we produce around 12,000 tons of replacement parts for a great variety of brands of excavators, loaders, and bulldozers, such as KOMATSU, CAT, HYUNDAI, DAEWOO/DOOSAN, VOLVO, etc. We also use two casting technologies to ensure that we provide satisfactory quality products at competitive prices.

We hope to hear back from you soon!

Best regards,

XXX
2023-06-07
追问:
  • Louis
    不可以
    2015-06-25
  • boscohuang
    Over one thousand models and 12000 tons productivity are guaranteeing your supplies and businesses. 哪就改成这样!
    2015-03-23
  • 汪永涛
    有点长,介绍公司只需简单的两句话,太多客户没时间看的
    2015-03-22
  • 张小华
    虽然我没什么经验 但真的感觉有点儿长 歪果仁都喜欢有多简就多简 感觉Over 到ect呢段可以删 换句一语中的的话有分量简短的话
    2015-03-22
  • boscohuang
    哦.有什么好的建议.
    2015-03-22
  • Nancy
    感觉太长了
    2015-03-21
  • Betty.Wang
    感觉挺好的
    2015-03-16
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